Yep, it sure is and it has come in full force...all the heat and humidity! Hot hot hot! Funny thing is that I don't find it as hot as it used to feel. Maybe it's because I've been to Thailand three times this year, where it was much hotter and much more humid. This year the summer in Tokyo doesn't seem too bad. Even the sky looks clearer with less pollution and smog than previous years. I know it's probably just my imagination or I'm a pathetic hopeful but really, it does look better.
Well, things are going so-so with my businesses. No change except for the fact that I am making a steady stream of income. I'm also hooked on Second Life, an online community in a virtual world of sorts. I'm still confused about my relationship and I'm still constantly trying to lose just a little more weight. Maybe I should consider going on a strict diet of eating nothing and only when I feel a bit lightheaded and dizzy, I should take a bite of cheese, like Emily in The Devil Wears Prada.
So why do I feel so lost once again? I know it must be because of the fact that I'm a selfish person, but I find myself asking, what's left? What else is there to life? Is this it? I also still find myself looking for just one more thing that's relevant in my life...something that has meaning and substance. I also would like to be more successful at something other than what I'm currently doing right now. I feel like I'm going in circles not really getting anywhere. The fact that I'm fantasizing about buying a bigger house in Second Life only confirms the fact that I'm trying to attain a lifestyle I truly desire in a fantasy world. Okay, I'm starting to write in spurts and not making too much sense. I need another block of cheese,. thank you.
Whatever, this is the state I'm currently in, period. I'm living in spurts and doing things that don't really give me any satisfaction. Sex is pretty meaningless and has become a simple pasttime just because I can get it so often and so easily...meaningless sex that is. Love is another matter all together, but I'm not going there today. Don't really have the energy.
On the other hand, I'm doing a load of laundry now and I have to wonder why I find pleasure in doing that. What's wrong here anyway?
The other day, I went to the park because it would've been a sin not to leave the house when the weather was so perfect. With a bottle of water in hand, I walked and walked and walked until I realized how big the park was! I took a seat on the grass and just took in the sights around me. People playing frizbee, a girl in her 20s trying to get an even tan for the beach, an older gay man lying in the sun half naked, a couple whispering sweet nothings in each others ears, a mother and daugther bonding over a perfect rose in the rose garden. I could go on and on about what I witnessed that day. Funny how you notice things when you're alone.
Today fridae.com keeps disappearing on me. I don't know but it seems to happen more often these days and it's quite frustrating when you're in the middle of sending an email. Grrrrr.....!!! Who can I complain to for God's sake! Well, I guess that gives me time to update my blog instead. Anyway, enough about Fridae. These days, like I mentioned before, I'm stuck on SECOND LIFE. By the way, if any of you out there get yourself into the SL World, my online name is Shinichi Mathy. Let's meet in the virtual world and have a cup of tea!
Another busy day for me today and a busy weekend I must say. A combination of work and play makes it more so. But hey, next weekend I go to Okinawa for two days. I know it's rather short for a place 3 hours away by plane. But I really need to be at a beach and a nice one at that. Beaches near Tokyo just don't do it for me. Yucky if you ask me! Plus I need to buy myself another annual pass for Disney Sea!!! Yay! I'm so looking forward to the next two weeks! Tonight I originally had a date with my boyfriend, but have to cancel due to work. I hope he's not too disappointed.
