Happy Birthday my Friends

Yesterday was a long day and I liked it. It was two of my friend's birthday and we decided to have the party at my place, just like last year. The great thing about having parties at my own home is the fact that I'm in control. I can make sure all the food is perfect and guests are comfortable. I also like that I can just crash after everyone leaves. haha. Can't really get more convenient than that.

I had it all planned. The menu was perfect and the cake was going to be amazing. It was going to be in the shape of a butterly with pastel colors, making sure it was over-the-top cute to please two of my best gay friends. They love cute so that's what they'll get!

However things didn't go as planned.

First, my cake didn't turn quite what I had planned. Before cutting the cake into a butterfly shape, I had frosted the entire cake so I was left with a round cake. Damn! What to do what to do? I panicked for a few seconds but immediately gathered my remaining strength.

I made do with what I had and went all out with the frosting and decoration, at least to my ability. I'm no cake master so I can only do so much. Anyway, take a look. This is what it looked like.

It took me an amazing 6 hours to finish making this cake. It's crazy I know, but I don't even want to try and explain how many steps there were in making this monstrosity. Oh, let me tell you it was one huge cake!

Disappointingly, it wasn't the best tasting, so I scolded myself and promised to try harder next time. I still have so much to learn about making cakes it's sometimes sad. Oh well, better luck next time Shinichi. 

My two friends were happy though. They are near and dear to me and although I don't get to see them that often, I always want to be sure that their birthdays are special.

Happy birthday K and R. I love you both.

My new Vlog and Why I Decided to Do Such a Dumb Thing In The First Place

Hi All.

With thanksgiving being just around the corner, memories of the past come to haunt me once again. Not that I think about the past much but ever since I started vlogging, I've been forcing myself to face them once again for the sake of making sure that I've overcome many past issues that used to bother me.

Oh, you didn't know I vlogged did you? Well I did and no, this is a completely separate YouTube Channel from TabiEats, which is focused on food and travel.

Shinichi's World got its inspiration from a website I used to have until 14 years ago, at which time I decided to just do away with. It was basically a website about my life and although it became popular and got featured a few gay magazines here in Japan, I felt uncomfortable sharing so much about myself. Along with all the wonderful messages came the torrent of hate mail, mostly from those who hated gay people.

I wasn't as strong then as I am now and certainly not as comfortable. I still had a lot of issues to deal with and after way too many times where people noticed me on the streets, in supermarkets and at the airport, I felt it was time to close shop.

Times have changed and so have I. At this age, I feel I have nothing to lose and as I'm nearing the age of 50 very soon, I feel it's time to challenge myself.

At first I was content with my TabiEats Channel and although I'm certainly happy with how that one is doing, I felt that I had things to express that just wouldn't fit into the food and travel category. There were many things I wanted to address in my life and hopefully, to inspire people in ways I'm still not sure yet.

Shinichi's World is an experiment that's for sure, and one that forces me to face my own fears. But seriously, I think that's exactly what I need.

So what's the message behind Shinichi's World besides well, me!

I guess I want people to face their own worst fears and face life head on. I want people my age to not have to "act" their age or let too much maturity get in the way of being what they want to be. We should be able to be and do whatever we desire, no matter how old we are.

I also want younger people, especially those who are going through difficult times, to know that I've been there before. Those who are trying to over come anxiety and panic attacks to know that it can get better. They are not alone.

I know I'm starting to babble as I tend to do but you know what I'm trying to say right? I just want to contribute, encourage and hopefully inspire people to just be who they are.

We basically have two choices in life. Love or fear. And I've decided to choose love. I no longer want to let fear get in the way of anything. Besides what do I have to lose? Lose face? Causing shame to myself?

Seriously? Who the hell cares!

Visit Shinichi's World on YouTube

My New YouTube Channel

A couple of months ago I started working on a new endeavor of mine. I started a YouTube Channel! Yes I did. And not only is the channel about my passions travel and food, it's about a lot of other fun stuff like food reviews, comparing Halloween burgers and other food-centric topics that I love to talk about.

Now the little details about the channel because it's kinda important you see. Satoshi, they guy who I live with ( my partner of 14 years ) decided that he'd like to join me on this venture. Now I wasn't sure about how this would work out and quite frankly, I was a bit scared. How is it going you ask?

Well, it's going good for the most part. But if I may be honest here, it's far from easy. In fact, it's quite difficult for the most part. But it's a learning process.

Since it's almost 3 am, I really should sleep but before I go, I just wanted to share with you my YouTube Channel. If you're still reading this blog, which I used to only update when I was either depressed, super happy or bored, check it out.

CLICK HERE TO MY YOUTUBE CHANNEL TABIEATS.

Thanks!

Roller Coaster Emotions

I'm not really sure what's wrong with me but I feel like I'm riding on a roller coaster-an emotional roller coaster and it's not stopping any time soon. I know what it's all about and deep inside, I know what I must do. I just don't know if it's the right thing to do.

Back in December, I went back to Hawaii to visit my family and although I was really excited at the prospect of seeing them again, I've never felt so much stress. My mother was the same and to tell you the truth, she hasn't changed onebit except for the fact that she looked healthier and more energetic than before. Perhaps she thrives on the arguments she gets into with my sister but whatever it is, it's doing her good. But it was my sister that stressed me out more than ever. I know that she's probably going through menopause so I have to try and be understanding, but I've never seen her more bitter, more condescending and insensitive to other people's feelings than I'd ever seen her. But like I said, she's going through a lot and she is after all, my sister so I'm going to cut her some slack. The thing about meeting them though and the things they said made me do a lot of thinking.

Now I know that I shouldn't let what others say affect me but when it comes from your family members, it tends to affect me just a little bit more. I cherish their opinions and maybe just a little too much. They had their opinions of what I should be doing with my life, who I should be dating and the list goes on and on. And yes I know this is the norm with every family out there. However I have to say that they put me through hell this time around. I'm going to be honest and I'm not going to lie to myself that they can sometimes make me feel worse than anybody else on earth.

Once I got back to my home in Tokyo, I did feel better. I had some time alone and I felt a sense of peace. This feeling of peace lasted pretty much the entire month of January. But today of all days, I feel a sense of unease. I feel as if I am in limbo and this has to do with the relationship I am in. My relationship has never been the best but I'm not the type to expect things from others. I accept. However this time, I am sensing a change in myself. Perhaps it's the lack of communication that's non-existent in my relationship. Or the fact that my feelings towards my partner is evolving towards a less good place. I really don't know yet because I haven't had time to process these feelings. All I know is that something's not quite right and it hasn't been for the longest time.

Now, one thing that my mother and sister says to me all the time is this, and truthfully this bugs me more than anything else. They feel that I should be thankful that somebody out there loves me. They make it sound as if I must hang on to this relationship no matter what the circumstances because I won't be able to do better. In other words, beggars can't be choosers. They remind me to "fear" the alternative rather than to encourage me to trust myself, love myself and respect myself the way I deserve to be. But then again, I won't expect anything from them because it is what it is.

I know I'm rambling all over the place today, but I needed to vent. I know I'll be fine. I just have to remind myself today what I promised myself years ago. To love myself and respect myself above all else. Because as Rupaul says in her shows, "If you can't love yourself, how the hell are you going to love someone else?

My 48th birthday with close friends

My closest friends got together and had a birthday party for me a week after my actual birthday. It was held at a restaurant serving Australian food. The birthday started off with glasses of champagne. 

Appetizers were yummy. I can't remember what I actually ate though. Too many glasses of champagne before food arrives is never a good idea. 

Warm salad with winter vegetables. 

Spaghetti with beef ragout, The Australian part being that it's made with Aussie beef. 

My big and beautiful gift box.

My very cute birthday cake. Notice the name-Shinchan! 

My closest friends 

And my birthday gifts!

Thank you all for a wonderful birthday this year. It was simply the best birthday week ever. 

Red Velvet Cupcakes with Cream Cheese Frosting

Yesterday I made this beautiful batch of red velvet cupcakes with cream cheese frosting. I've always had a thing about cupcakes and since I'm always craving them, I decided that the smart thing to do was to master making them myself. Since this was also a squidoo quest, they had to be perfect in looks as well as taste. I think I've finally mastered making the perfect red velvet cupcakes. Please check out my recipe on the link below.

Red Velvet Cupcake with Cream Cheese Frosting Recipe

Birthday Dinner with Satoshi

My partner took me to dinner at a new restaurant I've never been to. The Palace Hotel is a fairly new hotel with a history. Not going to get into that but I'll say that this restaurant is one of the best I've been to. Great food, great ambience and fabulous service. I had a bow tie on but I was too hot when I got there. I was sweating like a pig and decided to take it off.  The dinner was fantastic and we were stuffed. For dessert, a staff of 4 waiters, along with my partner sang happy birthday to me. I couldn't be any happier.

Seafood salad

Fish course with a rich and creamy burnt sauce. Sounds weird but totally yum!

Risotto with gorgonzola. 

Hokkaido crab terrine

Beef steak with winter root vegetables in yuzu sauce

Paella course

Molten center chocolate cake

Green tea tiramisu with caramel ice cream

My 48th Birthday with Vinn

 Thanks Vinn for making my birthday so special. The lunch at Roy's was wonderful followed by a luxurious high tea at Chinzanso which included the most wonderful tidbits and finger foods. It was the most perfect day! If only everyday was my birthday. Thank you so much!

One day before my birthday

My partner had made reservations at a restaurant for my birthday but I was down with the flu so it was postponed for a week later. Instead, he got me this lovely cake from Pierre Herme, which was honestly one of the best tasting cakes I've ever had. It was also incredibly pretty to look at. I am truly blessed. 

One week before my 48th birthday

I recently celebrated my 48th birthday. One week prior, my friends and I met up at Kaoru's restaurant, a Nepalese restaurant that he owns. He surprised me with a birthday cake, which was totally unexpected. The cake was pretty awesome. It consisted of a chocolate tart base followed by cream puffs, a few pieces of cheesecake and topped off with french macarons! Pretty awesome cake if you ask me.

I was glad to see some friends I haven't seen in a year. Michiko looked and seemed happier than ever. 

I got a bit of everything from the awesome cake itself. 

My friend Chouette got me this jar of preserved cherries from France. Yum! Thanks guys and thank you Kaoru for surprising me with a cake. 

Filled with so much gratitude.

Today I am filled with so much gratitude. I am overflowing with joy, happiness and gratefulness that I words aren't enough. So many things have changed in the past year and although at first I didn't realize it, they were changing towards a better direction. It's funny how you sometimes don't realize that what initially seems like a negative situation, turns out to be a blessing in disguise. It's funny how life works isn't it?

Earlier last year, I was hoping to extend my designs into the real world. I was working towards that and had even made a few contacts. Yet it didn't quite feel right. I wasn't sure why because it all sounded exciting, but it just didn't seem to click with me. Something inside didn't agree with the plans. Still, I ignored my feelings and continued to work hard at my designs. Nothing seemed to go right. Sales were stagnant and I found myself dreading the work. Something I enjoyed doing for the past few years, I suddenly lost the passion for it. Still, I didn't want to be a quitter and besides, there was nothing else for me to do.

One day, I stumbled upon a website called Squidoo. It was a writing platform that allowed you to create one-page articles or what they call "lenses". I thought that was cool and it looked like , with a few exceptions, you could write about anything you wanted. So I wrote my first lens. Then my second. Soon, I had a collection of lenses.

The troubling thing was I started to notice a shift inside of me. It scared me because the reality was, I was no longer interested in designing fashion for a virtual world. It no longer interested me and although I kept doing it, my passion started to wane. On the other hand, I lost track of time writing lenses about my passions, hopes and dreams. Something inside of me was unleashed and I suddenly felt that I stumbled upon something that was important.

Fast forward to today. I have complete writing 88 lenses for Squidoo. The amazing part of the whole process is the fact that people actually liked what I wrote. Dozens of people started to encourage me to live my life the way I wanted to, what my soul was telling me to do.

After I came back from a two-week visit to Hawaii to visit my family, my transformation was complete. My sister told me in not so many words, that I was wasting my time. My mother was surprisingly, a bit more understanding. Having been more than a little hurt by my sister's words, I finally realized that it was my life. The choice belonged to me and what mattered the most was living my life on my own terms.

So I stand here today, filled with gratitude to everyone who has touched my life in some way. Whether family members, friends or contacts on the internet, no matter how small or large, you have affected my life in a positive way. I don't believe in coincidences. I believe that everything has a purpose and a reason. I finally get it. Thank you!

My one big change in 2013

2013 was a very interesting year for me and a challenging one at that. One of the biggest changes that took place in my life was that I started to write again. More precisely, I started to write on a platform called Squidoo. You can read about my experience here.

http://www.squidoo.com/how-squidoo-has-changed-my-life

I hope to blog more and on a regular basis. I promise! Happy 2014 to everyone out there!

Good morning-Bad evening

This morning started out quite beautifully. I woke up after a good night's sleep and although I was still a bit groggy, I got up and made myself some almond flour pancakes. They were delicious and went perfectly well with my cup of kona coffee. Then I realized that I'm almost out of my precious kona coffee. That kind of bummed me out but then again, I am planning a visit to Hawaii soon so I really shouldn't be complaining.

So after breakfast, I did a little bit of work on Second Life before my partner came home. We decided to have a light lunch nearby before heading off to Rikugien, a beautiful park known for its autumn foliage and you know, it really is beautiful. However when we got there, my body was feeling quite weak and I had no idea why. My energy reserves were feeling very low and I felt a headache coming. We walked around at a steady pace until I realized that I wasn't really paying attention to the lovely trees around me so I knew something was wrong.

After a couple of hours, we decided to do some shopping in Ikebukuro. My partner wanted to go and look for a new printer so he browsed and looked at every single option for a full hour while I twiddled my thumb or yawned when he wasn't looking. I tried to pretent I was having fun but it was tough. I really don't enjoy being at the electronics shop. Just not my thing.

After that I was starving and we decided to eat at the organic restaurant nearby. I enjoyed the meal as always but towards the end of the meal, i started to feel off again. My headache was hurting me in the most strangest place and I was starting to feel sick. After paying the bill, I went to the toilet to sit down for a bit to see if the feeling would pass and after 15 minutes or so, I just said the heck with it and started on my way home. We boarded the train but I actually had to get off and rest for 20 minutes. Finally against my will, my partner told me to take an anti-anxiety pill. In the end, the pill did do its magic and I survived my commute back home.

Still though, I hate taking those pills and why on why do I have these bouts of anxiety or attacks or whatever the hell they are anyway? They are so frustrating!

Changing priorities

About 6 months ago, I accidently stumbled upon a site known as Squidoo and it has definitely changed my life. So far I've written over 70 articles ranging from food to coming out. Many topics to be sure but all meaningful and personal to me. I've also met a number of awesome people there and it's hard to put into words how grateful I am for that.

So I'm here sitting at my desk at 10:36 pm on Saturday night. 5 years ago it was hard to imagine myself being home on a Saturday night but how times have changed. Back then I enjoyed all the action and excitement of clubbing and going out to the trendiest new restaurant. I also loved parties with lots and lots of people. Today I like quiet moments at home.

Perhaps I'm just getting older and my tastes are changing. One thing I know for sure is that my priorities are totally different from what they used to be. It's more important now for me to make the most use of my limited time here on earth. I want to make the best use of each minute and enjoy every day of my life. I want to live consciously and deliberately and in the process, hopefully contribute to others around me in a positive way. That's all I want to do really. If I can do that, I am happy.

It's been a couple of good days

These past couple of days I've been waking up with a smile on my face. I can't pinpoint what changed in me but something has in a good way. This morning after a quite hilarious dream, I woke up feeling quite cheerful and happy. I wrote up my gratitude list (which I've been doing for some time now) and sent it to my friend. I decided to skip of day of writing articles as I've been making one every day for a couple of months now-I didn't want to burn myself out. It was good to rest and I really enjoyed this relaxing day.

This weekend, I'll try to get in a few squidoo articles and release a new dress for SHIKI. I'm also going to try and create a few designs for my Zazzle products. Now I'm trying to decide whether I should try and make some vanilla cupcakes or homemade chocolate....which sounds better. I just can't decide.

Wow, what a year it's been

This year was an interesting year for me and it felt like a wild roller coaster ride all the way. The year started out serene and calm but it didn't last for long. Trying to juggle different projects at the same time along with trying to figure out what I want to do with the rest of my life (really at your age?) while trying to keep gratitude lists, a workout schedule and worrying about aging has not been an easy task. Along the way, certain things took priority while other equally important things had to take a back seat. I also went through quite a lot of ups and downs with my emotions as well as mentally and I'm beginning to realize that maybe I've always been like this throughout my life. 

Now if what I just wrote is true, it's kind of disturbing to know that because it probably means I have big issues to deal with. We're already at the end of October and as Halloween passes us by, I am once again trying to figure out if I'm happy. I've always kept this part of cyberspace as real as I can and because it's been a good therapeutic tool for me personally, I'm going to keep it that way. I don't know why I'm starting to fear certain things in life and that just really sucks. Why am I letting these things get to me at this point in my life? 

So from this day forward and at least until the end of this year, I'll try and post something here on a daily basis thinking that at the least, it'll help with keeping me sane. 

Not everything was so bad this year. I started writing for squidoo which has been a good overall experience for me so far. It's helped me expand my interests as well as getting me closer to a dream I have had for the longest time. I've been able to stop taking so much meds for dealing with my panic disorder. I have a good sex life and that's always a good thing right. My dog is alive and I love him to pieces. I've also met many good people through my affiliation with squidoo and I'm grateful for that. 

Dear blog

Dear blog...
Once again it's been so long that I've posted. Life has kept me extremely busy and I guess that's a good thing. I work hard but I've also been playing hard so there's a good balance at this point in my life. Still in good health and although getting older, I think I'm aging gracefully as I possibly can. I don't go to the gym like I used to and now I simply do yoga, dance or climb small mountains. I also like going for long walks as Tokyo is a huge city.

Rainy season is here and will probably stay until the end of July. I used to hate this season. It's wet, sometimes non-stop rain, cloudy and overcast days for weeks on end and you come home with feet soaking wet. However this year I'm not hating it as much. I don't really know why, but it's not too bad. Perhaps it's because I know summer is right around the corner and I have all the summer festivities to look forward to. I also have an excuse to wear shorts and flip flops wherever I go.

I feel as if I've changed and evolved as a person during the past few years. I guess we all sort of change as we get older. I'm basically the same person and at the core, I haven't changed much. I do know that I am much more accepting and although I've never been the judgemental type, I am even less judgemental. In fact, I try not to judge anyone or anything. I simply accept because whether or not we agree with what's in front of us, variety really is what makes life so interesting.

Tomorrow is a new day. I truly look forward to the next chapter in my life.

Another cold day

The temperature seems to drop a degree as each day goes by. I try to stay upbeat and positive about the winter by thinking of everything that's the holiday season....the sweets, food and twinkling lights in the city. Still I admit I dread the winter. I just don't do well in the freezing cold. I find myself looking for deals on flights to Singapore, Hawaii and even Guam. If Korea were warm during the winters, I would be there more often that's for sure. The fuel surcharge is only 2500 yen one way and tickets can be had for a very low price.

Last night I had the weirdest dreams again. Part one was about my mother. We were at a little stall in my neighborhood where my mother was interested in a little jade ring. She told me to grab the little wooden contraption next to her so I did. I had no idea what it was but anyway, she started to push me away so we could hurry home. I had no idea what all the rush was about but when we got home, she told me that she forgot to pay for the ring! I demanded that we go back to return the ring and that wooden contraption I had brought back with me. As I went to get the key, my mom had already left on her own so I hurried after her to the stall. As I came closer to the stall I could see my mother sitting on a chair with a sad and uncomfortable look on her face. As I approached, the lady at the stall started to yell at me for stealing the wooden contraption as they needed that for business. She was also very upset about the jade ring that my mother forgot to pay for. I profusely apologized for the mistake and told her I had no idea what the wooden contraption was for. My mother started to blame me for taking it without permission so I spat back at her saying that she practically forced me to take it. At that moment my mother started making this wimpering sound and she started to talk gibberish. I immediately felt guilty for making my mother sad. At that moment I woke up from my dream realizing that it was my dog that was wimpering to let out of the room.

After letting my dog out, I went back to sleep because it was too early and too cold to pull myself out of the warm bed. Dream part two starts. My friend and I check into a luxury hotel in someplace that looked like Los Angeles. All I remember was that it was warm and there were palm trees outside. The first room we get is just terrible and I immediately go down to the front dest to complain. I tell them that we need the room changed and that I was a regular guest there so I deserve a better room. They tell us to wait in the lobby while they try to remedy the problem. A few seconds later they come back apologizing and to let us know that they have prepared a suite for us. I have no idea why we are upgraded to a suite but I am way too excited to be staying in a suite! My friend and I decide to go to a bar for a drink. The waiter comes up to us and says that we are invited to a special dinner tomorrow night. He tells me that I am invited because the dinner is exclusively for lawyers. He also tells me that I was upgraded to the suite because they didn't realize  was a lawyer. Should I just admit I'm not a lawyer and forfeit my suite? Or should I just go with the flow and pretend I am a lawyer at the dinner? I imagine myself trying to act all professional and coming up with lawyer topics like in those Bridget Jones movies. At that moment I wake up once again.

So I had two strange dreams back to back. I'm feeling kind of strange and blue in bed with my dog. I look at my dog lying next to me and feel so much love for him. I then start to wonder about my relationship to my partner again. I don't know what triggered this feeling. Was it the dream that I just had that's messing with my head? Or is it something else? Why am I feeling this way?

Summer is finally here!

It's been a fairly short rainy season this year here in Tokyo and that's totally fine by me. Grey skies and constant raining does not make me happy. The Tokyo summer is pretty brutal by any standards. The other day, it was 35 degrees where I live. What makes is worse is that we have an energy shortage this year and we are expected to cut electricity usage by at least 30%. So went out and bought a fan and disconnected my air conditioning in every room. At first it took some getting used to and I had a hell of a time trying to sleep at night. I bought a "cooling" pillow, which only made me hotter. I also found something that you spray onto sheets or clothes to make you cooler. It just made my skin tingle temporarily. I also bought a cream that you apply to your skin. It instantly makes your skin feel cold but interesting only for a minute. After experimenting with these different things that is supposed to help you feel cooler, I finally just got rid of my sheets, blanket and pillows and just decided to sleep with a thin t-shirt and cool, loose underwear. I also have a glass of ice water next to my bed, which helps a bit. Anyway, it's only going to get hotter so we'll see how it goes.

My face is mostly back to normal from the bout of bell's palsy. I still have tightness in my face and for some reason it makes me feel sick sometimes but I can live with it. I take anti-anxiety meds which is supposed to help me with all of that and it seems to work a bit. The only thing I worry about sometimes is that I will become dependent on the meds. My doc says that I have nothing to worry about since they are very low dosage. I'll just take his word for it because honestly, I don't think I could deal with the facial pain without something.

This year I've been working on balancing my life. The past few years I've never worked harder in my life and I thought that was a good thing. Apparently that was one of the causes of my stress which could have contributed to my facial paralysis. I've also met some new people along the way this year. Most of these meetings seem to end after a few dates but that's just how it is. However a couple of these people have actually helped me keep my life balanced and focused. Maybe because they don't know me as well as my friends, they can be honest with me. Or perhaps they just see me in a different light. Needless to say, it is refreshing to get a different perspective of myself. I've learned that I have a tendency to feel responsible for the welfare of the people I love and this adds a tremendous amount of stress to myself. For some reason I didn't see that. I realize now that it is not my responsibility to take care of them and that what I do for them is enough. I also have to think of myself and take care of myself. I know this in theory, but I'm not so good at it. So this is what I must work on for the remainder of the year. The funny thing is that I probably would never have realized this unless I decided to go out and meet new people.

My partner has been really stressed due to his pay cut. It used to bother me because I think we are still very lucky. We have a comfortable apartment and a car. We have new computers, ipads, iphones, clothes and our health. Gosh, I can go on and on. But he seems to be in mourning. There are others who have lost homes and families during the tsunami and earthquake. I feel damn lucky to be alive and I wish he would see that. I guess that's another thing that adds to my stress. So I decided the best thing to do is to be happy for the both of us. While he's sulking and thinking dark thoughts, I'm going to enjoy life to the fullest. Maybe my happiness will rub off on him.

Summer is here and I'm ready to enjoy it!

Random thoughts

So it's been a little over two months since the earthquake-tsunami disaster here in Japan. At least here in Tokyo, things are pretty much back to normal. One thing that has changed though, is how conscious we have become of our energy resources. The train stations are not running their escalators and only the minimum amount of lighting is used. Trains are running on a decreased schedule and lighting from store shelves to billboards are either turned off or kept to a minimum. Half the street lamps are off so nighttime is darker here in Tokyo. After awhile we are used to it and perhaps we have been using too much electricity. Do we really need all the flash and neon lights everywhere? Perhaps that's what makes Tokyo the exciting city we are known for. At least for now, we are in conservation mode.

My partner had to take a 30% decrease in pay with will be taking home no bonuses for the forseeable future. He is depressed about it and he is being super-consious about spending money. In fact he is being so tight with money that it is rather starting to depress me as well. He still makes more than the average medium income earner here and he owns a car and home. Still he is worried and stressed with his work situation that he cannot see how fortunate we are. I have friends that are in worse situations. There are those that have lost much much more. Yet he can only see how bad his own situation is.

I wish he could see things in a different light. I wish he had the strength to see past his own problems and see them for what they really are. They are just temporary and it's not the end of the world for him. I will continue to stand by him and say things to comfort him. I will be there if he needs me to help. Hell if he loses his job I will be there to support him. You know what really bugs me though? The fact that he's thinking of getting an iPAD while he's complaining about me buying those spring rolls yesterday for a measly 600 yen!!! Geeeesh!

Anyway, just found a picture of me and my friends in Singapore. Good times!!!